‘Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire’ and Veering Into Unexpected Horror
The latest unnecessary sequel to a delightful 1984 film is crammed with shit fan service, but does manage to make the entire fictional universe suddenly very, very dark.
NEW STANDARD DISCLAIMER: This newsletter aggressively spoils things.
I have nothing against sequels or reboots or feeding scripts into AI generators and turning them into thirteen-hour long orchestral arrangements or whatever1. For every reboot that’s an inexplicable abomination there’s a Batman Begins, so I’m happy to let other people throw their money into the abyss and take a gamble just in case I get two hours of mild entertainment out of it2. In other words, the system works!
The Ghostbusters franchise is particularly inexplicable. The original 1984 film was a delightful surprise that combined a goofy Dan Akroyd-adjacent premise (man sure does like his weird theories) with some sharp writing and Bill Murray’s still-fresh schtick3. From there it’s been a strangely sterile and fitful downward slide: The 1989 sequel was not great, and then there were a few oddball TV animated things in the 1980s and 1990s, then nothing for a long time4. In 2016 they tried a total reboot with the Melissa McCarthy-led Ghostbusters, which I actually thought was okay, but when it didn’t set the world on fire they switched gears and went for a late-inning direct sequel with 2021’s Ghostbusters: Afterlife and then 2024’s Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire. Neither of these movies do much more than vainly try to recreate the magic of the original, with a side of trying to make tiny Stay Puft Marshmallow Men into an off-brand Minions5.
In other words, despite the last two films earning about $400 million combined it’s not clear who’s clamoring for these movies. And if there’s any sanity in the world there will be even less clamoring after Frozen Empire, which somehow combines some truly lazy fan service (there are literally scene that can best be described as “and then Bill Murray showed up” with a stage direction instructing the story to pause briefly for applause6) with an honestly disturbing plot line that kind of ruins the whole premise. Like, actually ruins it.
The Beatings Will Continue
Frozen Empire brings the Spengler family (descendants of Egon Spengler (Harold Ramis), the dude who designed and built all the Ghostbustery technology that captures and processes ghosts) to New York city, where they live in the old firehouse Ghostbusters headquarters and work at the family business of, you know, bustin’ ghosts7. But strange things are afoot: There’s a mysterious brass ball that contains something dangerous and quite cold, yada yada—but more importantly, the Ecto Containment Unit where they stuff all the captured ghosts has been in continuous use since 1984 and is clearly starting to break down due to overcrowding8. In other words, the Ghostbusters capture ghosts and then just shove them into a tiny, man-made Purgatory9.
Later, depressed and super-smart Phoebe Spengler (Mckenna Grace) meets a friendly ghost in Washington Square Park named Melody (Emily Alyn Lind) and strikes up a friendship. So, putting these two facts together: Ghosts have awareness of their existence and are being stuffed into a metal box and left to rot. The mind suddenly boggles at the cruelty here. No wonder ghosts are trying to kill the Ghostbusters and incidentally destroy New York City (again). The Ghostbusters are suddenly terrible, terrible monsters10.
Until Morale Improves
Overthinking a greed-inspired piece of studio cheese? Perhaps, perhaps, but that’s my job, man11. And honestly, it’s a big shift from earlier films. Most of the ghosts and spirits the Ghostbusters deal with up until Melody are either gross, inhuman things like Slimer, and even the rare humanoid ghost like the library lady in the original film transformed into a shrieking monster, hinting that perhaps she was not a person, was not aware of her endless suffering, you know?
Melody changes everything. Here is a ghost who knows she’s a ghost. Who can care about other entities. Who expresses regret and affection. Which implies there may be other spirits like her—and some of them may be trapped in the Containment Unit, howling in the void, left to rot.
I mean, I guess as much as I actually thought about the Ghostbusters universe and the rules thereof I always kind of assumed that either a) all ghosts were mindless, hostile haunts or b) the Ghostbusters did something with the spirits after capturing them. Exorcised them? Guided them over the rainbow bridge via seance12? I don’t know, but something. Instead, I have now been reliably informed by screenwriters Gil Kenan and Jason Reitman that nothing is ever done with the ghosts except they are subjected to steadily increasing pressure as more ghosts are added to the tiny containment system they now exist in. And I am sad13.
This kind of harshes the whole good times buzz of the franchise, honestly. As does the dumb way the film tosses in every possible reference to the original films it can think of just to say it was there. But a dumb Ghostbusters sequel is kind of par for the course and not worth writing 1,000 words about. A Ghostbusters sequel that turns the whole premise dark and horrifying is something else entirely. If I thought for a moment that this was intentional I might even be impressed14.
What does impress me is Ernie Hudson. Man is 78 years old and looks like he’s 33. I want to follow him around and just observe him for six months or so, learn something.
NEXT WEEK: The Watchers and thematic lard.
If you enjoy this newsletter, consider subscribing to my paid fiction Substack, Writing Without Rules: From the Notebook!
I can neither confirm or deny that I have done this or that it attained sentience and now plays itself on every device I come near hoping to drive me insane.
Or even something that attains “leave on in background on mute while I whittle” levels of entertainment. I mean, heck, it’s not my money being set on fire by Zach Snyder.
Someday science will study how he turned “look bored and unprepared” into an acting style.
That sentence kind of describes my own life, which is kind of disturbing.
I do find the Stay Puft Marshmallow Men to be pure nightmare fuel, so maybe it’s working! We need more scenes of terrified Stay Pufts being boiled in cocoa, however.
They even restage his “bullshit research” sequence from the original film just so people my vintage can do the Leo Pointing meme.
Because bustin’ makes them feel good. Wait, that sounds soooooo dirty.
This also describes my house, which is full of cats. Like, full of cats. How did this happen? How did I get here? This is not my beautiful house!
Did … did I just discover that the Ghostbusters franchise is a down-low critique of capitalist exploitation? Let’s say I did. I will accept my award monies in crypto.
I guess all the collateral damage they inflict in each movie might have been a clue.
My job is also to eat potato chips, apparently, based on the sheer volume.
This is America! Can’t the ghosts power our phones or become our valets or something?
Well, more sad. I dropped my sandwich earlier.
That sentence is kind of my whole vibe.
Now THIS is a story. Mind if I steal it for the St. Remedius newsletter, giving proper credit? Or do you want to run with a book on it on your own?